Only 53% of Men Can Find The Male G-spot (The Prostate)
Let's change that. Here's an illustrated guide
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September is Prostate Cancer Awareness Month, which might just win the prize for the least sexy awareness month ever. This isn’t like Breast Cancer Awareness Month, where everyone knows the anatomy and has the pink merch to prove it.
Instead, we’re talking about a gland that half the population can’t even locate. When the Urology Foundation surveyed 2,000 men in the UK, only 53% could find their prostate on a diagram. (Hint: it’s not where the sun don’t shine.)
You can’t raise awareness for something if half the male population has no idea where it is.
Even worse, 7 out of 10 men don’t know the role their prostate plays during sex. That means 70% of men are sitting on — well, technically not sitting on, but you get the idea — a goldmine of pleasure potential and haven’t even bothered to dig for it.
Part of the problem is the nonsensical belief that only gay men enjoy prostate massages. Manly men derive pleasure from their penis only. Blah, blah, blah. That kind of homophobic belief is causing straight men to lose out on having stronger orgasms. It’s like having the keys to a Ferrari and letting it sit in your garage. Tragic.
So, let’s clear up the myths — what is the prostate, where is it, and how can it be a huge source of pleasure?
What is the prostate?
The prostate is an “accessory sex gland,” which sounds like something you’d buy at a racy shop, but it’s actually an integral part of your reproductive system. The prostate contains smooth muscle cells that contract and forcefully press the fluid that has been stored in the prostate out into the urethra. And voila…ejaculation. While the testes provide the actual sperm, the bulk of the semen volume comes from the prostate and seminal vesicles. So the next time there’s a “money shot,” thank your prostate.
However, the prostate creates more than cinematic drama. It also cranks out a substance called prostate-specific antigen (PSA), which helps liquefy semen, making it easier for sperm to do their job. Think of PSA as the WD-40 for your swimmers, ensuring they easily glide through.
Prostatic fluid also has antimicrobial properties, primarily due to its zinc content. Consequently, prostatic fluid can help keep the urinary tract and urethra clear of infections. Some older studies suggested that regular prostate massage could flush out harmful agents, reducing the risk of certain prostate conditions, but more recent research does not support these claims. Studies have been small in both camps, so more research is needed.
Where is it located?
Now, for the big reveal…First, the prostate isn’t in your rectum, so let’s dispel that myth right now. The prostate is located beneath the bladder and above the rectum.
This is going to require another of my bubblegum penis graphics from my medical illustration days. My mom thought I would never use these skills.
The prostate is often compared to a walnut, which sounds vaguely painful. A more accurate description might be a small plum — soft, spongy, and ready to lend its juicy assistance. Unlike a walnut, this little guy isn’t crunchy, and thank goodness for that.
Some sex educators like to call the prostate the “P-spot” or the “male G-spot” because, let’s face it, most men clench their sphincters when they hear the word prostate. Personally, I think you should name your body parts whatever feels sexy and fun. (I’ve got my “John Oliver spots.”)
However, from a sex-ed standpoint, calling the prostate a “spot” is misleading. Unlike with real estate, when it comes to pleasure, it’s not just about location, location, location. There’s way more to prostate pleasure than just finding the correct GPS coordinates.
Sure, you need to be in the right area to feel prostate sensations. If you’re too deep, too shallow, or aiming off to one side, you’ll probably not feel much of anything. But even if you hit the bullseye, there’s no guarantee of fireworks. Sometimes, you can be massaging the prostate like a pro, and your partner will still feel… well, nothing. In some cases, men report discomfort, numbness, pain, or the sudden urge to pee when their prostate is touched.
As discussed in a previous article on the clitoris, both female and male pleasure isn’t about one exact “spot” but about the network of nerves that radiate out in all directions like a high-voltage power grid. If sexual pleasure were a one-map-fits-all situation, we would probably be having more of it.
How a prostate orgasm differs from a penile orgasm
Most men will tell you that a prostate orgasm and a penile orgasm are two very different beasts. Penile orgasms tend to feel sharp and localized like all the fireworks are set off in one concentrated area.
Prostate orgasms, on the other hand, are more like a slow-building wave. The sensations are often described as dull, diffuse, or broader. It’s less of a sparkler and more of a bonfire that spreads warmth across a larger area. This kind of pleasure feels internal and tends to radiate outward, spilling into other parts of the genitals, pelvis, or even the whole body. (Incidentally, many women describe orgasms from the internal vs. the external portion of the clitoris in the same way.)
Other men say a prostate orgasm feels like the warm-up phase of a typical orgasm. I don’t have the machinery, but this makes sense. Since the prostate swells as it’s massaged, there’s a sense of pressure that mimics what happens just before ejaculation.
Should you invite the penis to the party?
Prostate stimulation can trigger an ejaculatory orgasm all on its own, but it’s far more common when you add in a little penis action at the same time. Interestingly, it can even make it easier to ejaculate without a full erection – an added perk for anyone struggling with erectile dysfunction. And yes, prostate play can also lead to ejaculation without orgasm – otherwise known as the Christmas that never comes.
How to Massage the Prostate
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